This transcript has been lightly edited from the original recording to ensure that the intended meaning is conveyed as clearly as possible. Note that Hmm, Mmm, Ahh, and … signify places to pause, and to feel into yourself and what is being said. Comments in [square brackets] are editorial explanations rather than part of the message.
The New Love · Session 3
How Shame Affects Your Life
With Master Anna, channeled by John McCurdy
I am that I am!
Master Anna, of Magical Service.
Welcome back, dear friend, to our class on love and magic. And indeed, on shame.
Because, you see, shame is what keeps you from love. It keeps you from magic. It keeps them out of your life. So, let's talk a little bit about how it affects your life.
But first, let's take some time here. Take out your notebook, if you will, and write down all the different ways you can think of right now that you feel ashamed of yourself, or that you have felt ashamed of yourself.
Oh, let's be honest here, for talking about these things will not make them bigger in your life. If anything, it will help to release them.
This is important, so we are going to take twenty minutes. John will put a little music in the background, and we'll ask him to do this exercise along with you.
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So, what shame do you feel about yourself?
What places do you feel ashamed of yourself?
What places have you felt ashamed of yourself?
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If you run out of things to write down in the twenty minutes, just be still and allow your mind to wander around. It will come up with more things. Because, you see, you came to Earth with such a huge load of shame!
Oh, you remember some of your past lives and the shame you felt there, and the pain you feel from those lifetimes. But they are just reflections of what went on before you even came to Earth.
Oh, they are real. They are intense. They are deep. But what happened before you came to Earth was so intense, so difficult for you, so... Oh, we'll just say that you brought so much shame with you to Earth, and now you are feeling that shame.
You cannot identify it, exactly, but you are feeling it. And it is affecting your life, because this is the time to let it go. This is the time to welcome it home, so that you can be whole once again.
So, twenty minutes. Take the time. John is going to be sitting here writing, and I am right here with him.
I am his soul, if we hadn't made that clear before, and this class is as much for us as for you. For you see, this is about bringing home the shame of many, many lifetimes, and a whole lot more from before your lifetimes even began.
Mmm...
So, how do you feel ashamed of yourself?
What about yourself do you feel ashamed of?
What about yourself have you felt ashamed of?
Just write down whatever pops into your mind. Whether it is from this lifetime or some other, or beyond, just write it down.
No stories. Keep it simple, but be honest. Don't run away from it.
You don't need to share this with anyone else. It is between you and your soul.
And oh yes, if you allow it, your soul is right here with you, just as I am right here with John. Let her in.
We say ‘her’ because that's how John experiences me, but it doesn't matter. It can be ‘him’ if you prefer, or whatever. It doesn't matter. Your soul is here, if you let it.
It won't force itself on you. But if you let it, it is right here. It is with you. It is going through this class with you.
Mmm...
So, twenty minutes.
Oh, and keep it about yourself. Don't bring other people into this class, for it will mess you up. This is about you.
What about yourself do you feel ashamed of?
Where have you felt shame in your life?
And begin.
[music begins, writing for around four minutes]
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Again, this is important. This is about bringing consciousness to you and to the shame you carry, so keep going.
[writing for around six minutes]
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Ten more minutes. Keep writing, there’s plenty there.
[writing for around eight minutes]
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Take a couple of minutes to finish up, and to feel what you've been writing. There is so much!
Don't analyze it, please. Just feel. You will find that there is so much underneath even that.
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Come back now, and let's continue with our discussion.
Mmm...
You might notice that it [the shame] is different now. It's not as heavy as it used to be.
For you see, if you were drawn to this class, then you and your soul have been working on this for a while now.
So, let's not add shame on top of shame by thinking that you should have been doing better by now. That's not how it works.
You are right where you need to be! We'll get to that more later, but right now let's take a look at how the shame affects your life.
Well, as we discussed before, it drains your energy, and then you go looking for that energy from other people.
Occasionally you find somebody who is willing to freely give their energy for a time, and that is beautiful for as long as it lasts.
You can even discover a mutual feeding arrangement where you are both giving each other energy, and that works for a while. It can even create a beautiful relationship, for a time. But eventually, it always, always breaks down.
Because the human spirit, the angelic spirit, if you will, simply cannot allow itself to be fed on forever. It doesn't work. It needs to be free. And so at some point it all breaks down, and what was a beautiful relationship for a time, becomes a bitter relationship. A difficult, bitter, vengeful relationship, and you wonder what went wrong.
Mmm...
You see, when you feel shame, it creates this hunger inside of you. It's like a big hole, or even like a big vacuum cleaner.
It is desperate for energy. It is desperate to feel better about itself, so you go through life sucking in energy wherever you can. And over the eons you've learned that the best way to get somebody's energy is to shame them.
Truly, if you want somebody's energy just put them in shame, because then they will let you feed on them all you want. Until they reject you and throw you out.
So, people go through life shaming others, criticizing others, manipulating others, all to try to get that energy that they are so desperate for. And it rips you apart.
It creates beautiful relationships, or seemingly beautiful relationships. You fall in love, because this person is giving you their energy even as they are feeding on yours. It’s mutual and you fall in love, and it's so wonderful! So beautiful! And the feeding gets more and more intense, until finally somebody realizes that they are being fed on and pulls back. And suddenly it all falls apart. It all blows up in your face and you wonder, “What happened? Why didn't that work out? Why are they so angry at me now? Why am I so angry at them now?”
It is because it was based on energy stealing.
Mmm...
Oh, this brings us to our discussion of love.
Love. Oh, the word has so many different meanings. There are all different kinds of love. There is mother love, there is parental love, there is sibling love, there is friendly love, romantic love, and all these things that have to do with other people.
All these things create some very real experiences, because when you fall in love with someone or feel a connection with someone, your brain floods your body with chemicals. Drugs. Real drugs! And they flood out through your body and make you feel so good! They make you feel like you are in love!
Until you are not.
Because, you see, that is not love. That comes not just from the shame, but it also comes from this instinct to make babies, to perpetuate the species, to protect your family and your loved ones.
Mmm...
Love itself is a fairly new thing. It was discovered by humans on Earth, and only in the last few thousand years was it even a concept.
And even now there are places on Earth where love means nothing, where relationships and marriages come about through the machinations of politics and power. Parents decide who their son or daughter can marry based on who will bring them the most power and the most prestige, not on love.
But you, you have discovered love.
Oh, and there are all these other things that feed into it. These instincts, these chemicals in your body, this feeling of attraction, the hole inside of you that your shame is so desperate to fill. All of that gets called love.
And it actually brings about hate, because when that kind of love blows up, as it always does, it brings on the hate. The anger. The rage. The betrayal. And more shame. Piles and piles of more shame! And more feelings of failure, which is just another way of saying shame.
Oh, this shame is desperate! It is longing to come home, but it cannot get home until you let it. And until then, oh, it sucks you dry! It drains your energy. It destroys your body. It ruins your finances. It causes disease. It causes addictions.
It is the root of addictions, because in an addiction you are trying to fill that hole with something. Whether it is alcohol or drugs or sex or whatever it is. There are many, many forms of addiction, and they are all rooted in that shame.
So, the time has come to bring it home.
Oh, you could say... Hm, we’re not sure if we agree with this or not, but you could say that the shame has served you. It has certainly created a lot of difficult and intense experiences, and through those experiences you have discovered yourself and you have answered that question of, who am I? What am I?
You look at your life and you may not feel like it's been answered yet, but it has. And we ask you to trust that.
Feel it inside of yourself. Don't think about it, don't analyze it, because that answer does not fit into the human mind. It simply doesn't fit! The mind cannot comprehend it.
It can touch the edges of it. We can say things like, “I am that I am, I exist,” and that touches the edge of it.
But truly, you have the answer. Even though it doesn't fit in your mind.
If you feel into your knowing, you will know it is there. But you might never be able to define it, let alone put it in words. But it is there, and with that answer, it is time to come home.
It is time to welcome all of this shame and all these parts of you that feel so ashamed and so rejected. It is time to welcome them home.
Are you ready?
Are you ready to look those darkest parts of you in the eye and say: Welcome home! I accept you, just the way you are. I know what you did, or what you didn't do. I know you feel like a failure in so many ways, and that is okay with me. I welcome you home.
Mmm...
Oh, there is another facet of shame, that has to do with other people. You see, one of the biggest defenses that angels came up with for those feelings of shame was to try to put it onto others, to deflect it, to blame everyone else for what they felt inside of themselves.
And of course humans only took that deeper, to where at this point very, very few humans are willing to take responsibility for their lives or for their feelings. They blame it on everyone else. And down inside they know that's wrong, that it doesn't work, and so it just brings more and more and more shame back on themselves.
It is time to recognize that.
You see, you are a sovereign creator. You are the one and only creator of your life and of your experiences.
So often it looks like somebody else created those experiences for you, but that is only how it looks. You could say they did it because you asked them to. You may not have gone out and said, “Oh, hey, friend, please hurt me!” but you allowed it to happen.
You are sovereign, and you cannot have it both ways. You cannot be sovereign and blame others.
You cannot be free and blame others.
This is all about you.
And you will find that as you bring home that shame within you, others will begin to relate to you in a different way. But first, you have to bring that shame home inside, because they are always, always going to reflect what is happening inside of you.
Are there people you don't like in your life? Then take a look at the parts of you that you don't like and bring them home, and those people will either change or leave your life. They will no longer matter.
Are there people you like in your life? Well, welcome those parts home too!
Look inside of you. There are a lot of parts there to like! And you have rejected a lot of them because they made you feel bad. They made you feel the dark ones more. They made you feel your failures more. So you rejected them and pushed them away. It is time to let those come home too.
There is so much good in you! So much beauty! So much grandness!
Ahh...
Together with John we do private channels for people. We connect them with their own soul and we channel that soul, so that they can feel a taste of themselves.
So many people come to us, but they are terrified that their soul is going to yell at them for all the ways they are failing and messing up their lives. But in all of our experience, that has never happened. Because, you see, Soul does not care about those things.
Humans are so afraid of a god, a divinity, that judges them like an angry parent, and that is not how it is at all. The only beings in all of existence that judge others, are humans!
Oh, there are angels who copy you and try to do it also, but mostly it is a human thing. It is never, ever, divinity that judges you.
There is no grand judgment when you die, to determine if you lived a good life or not. No, just the fact that you came to Earth and you lived, that is good enough.
No matter how you lived, no matter what you did, no matter how you treated other people, it does not matter! Not to divinity, and not to your source. It is just another experience.
So, are you ready to let all that shame go, and all that self-judgment?
Because that is all it is. It is self-judgment. It is you, judging you. That's all.
There is no God that judges you, in any way.
Oh, certainly other people judge you, but that is only because they have so much shame inside of themselves. And what they think about you really does not matter!
Mmm...
We will ask dear Romana Aniya, John's wife and her soul, if they would like to add a session here to help you integrate all of this.
Ahh...
Oh, but we are nowhere near done! We will be back.
We ask you to take a break, yet again. John is taking a break after this session. He will be back tomorrow, along with me, to dive into the solution.
The real solution to the shame is self-love. It is the hardest thing that any human or angel will ever do, and also the most beautiful and the most rewarding.
Mmm...
We'll ask you to take a 20-minute break for your own feeling and integration, and your own body's needs, and then we will have an integration session.
And then, we ask you to pause there. Don't just go on.
Wait until tomorrow. Sleep on this, what we have done so far, and then come back. And we will see you in a day.
And so it is.
Copyright © 2025 by John McCurdy and Romana Ercegović. All rights reserved.